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Posted by on Mar 21, 2014 in Blog | 2 comments

Eroticon 2014: girl snogs, bottoms and VIPs


It has been nearly two weeks since Eroticon 2014, so how was it for me?

Well it was pretty fucking awesome and as ever that is probably for different reasons than for anyone else.

What is true for me as it is for many others is that it is always, always a much needed event to meet up with friends we see all too seldom in person as well as making new friends and opening up new possibilities both personally and professionally.

As with every year I am personally humbled that so many amazing writers, artists and creators agreed to come and share their experiences and knowledge so generously to inspire their peers.

And yes, I’m humbled that people continue to hand over their hard earned cash for tickets to my lil smut conference but at the same time I work damned hard to make sure they get an amazing experience that just doesn’t happen anywhere else.

This year was fantastic in that over half the attendees were new to the event, which demonstrates that, although there were some friends we were missing, the conference continues to be relevant, needed and appeal to a broadening audience.

Being back in Bristol was fabulous too, as much as I love London and I loved the venue in London as a space, it wasn’t the right home for the conference and the warm, easy welcome we got at Armada House confirmed that there is something special about that space for the event.  There were some IT issues, but nothing that can’t be overcome with some extra planning next time.

It was good to be in Bristol again for the finances too, I took a hoofing loss on the London event despite ticket sales and sponsorship being up, the venue fees pretty much crippled me and so to have the event back in the black if not the company balance sheets, well that was a good feeling too.  If Eroticon 2014 hadn’t at least broken even I would have had to stop running the conferences and I really really really don’t want to do that.  I know lots of people will think it odd to share such details, but I feel it is time to be honest about why I make the decisions I make with relation to the conference.  The community of writers and sex bloggers that attend really do invest themselves into the event and take ownership of it so if we are to move forward it is time to be honest about where we are at.

For me the overall feeling of Eroticon 2014 was of a confident and focused event; a grown up event.  The last two UK events have been about finding the way, the US event benefited from a consolidated vision from the previous two and this was carried through to Bristol 2014.

I also loved our sponsors this year, who really joined in with the event and helped make it fun and informative.  What’s not to love about a company that brings along an antique vibrator?  It has also been fabulous seeing the way in which connections made at the event have translated into raised awareness and dare I say, sales, for sponsors.  So a heartfelt thank you to Doxy, Give Lube, Belle De Soir, Lelo, Constable Robinson, House of Erotica and Velvet Books.

Which brings me onto you guys, YOU GUYS! Eroticon doesn’t exist without all the attendees of the previous conferences as well as the reprobates and perverts that turned up this year.  THANK YOU!   In particular I couldn’t have done it without the generous and loyal friendship and support of some VIPs (Very Important Perverts)

A huge huge thank you to Molly, Michael, Ruby, Violet and Harper for being part of team ARGH WHY AM I DOING THIS TO MYSELF, TELL ME IT IS ALL GOING TO BE OKAY!

And thank you to everyone that attended and who I got to share so much time with and yet not enough time with.

I’m sorry this hasn’t done justice to the amazing speakers, sessions and sponsors, the fun and frolics that were had, the girl snogs, oh yes there were girl snogs (twice, well technically three times) and the fact that Pandora Blake complimented me on my bottom (and she should know!).

My Eroticon 2014 was wonderful and fun and not as stressful as other years and filled with so many hugs and smiles.  Thank you to everyone that helped make it what it was.

 

Thanks for reading,

Ruby x

If you enjoyed my writing you can find more of my erotic fiction stories on Amazon.co.uk and Amazon.com, don't be shy leave a review!

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Posted by on Jan 24, 2014 in Blog, Erotic pictures | 11 comments

How boudoir photography helped me define myself

How boudoir photography helped me define myself

Six  years ago I had a boudoir photography shoot with Matt Christie and it helped to change my life.

At the time, I booked the shoot to boost my self esteem and to make a present for my husband, it did both but when I started writing erotica and using the name Ruby Kiddell those photos became integral to me and helped shape my identity. For a very long time I used a crop of the photo below as my Twitter avi – the legs became Ruby and folk would complain if I changed the picture for anything else.

Ruby Kiddell

Even now the headshot I use is a crop of one of Matt’s photos

ruby kiddell

I love the photos that Matt took for so many reasons – they were taken just before I fell pregnant so they mark a moment in time, a closing of one part of my life before I became a mama.

They showed me in a way that I had only ever seen myself in my head – I wanted to look glamorous and sexy but never quite saw myself as that and so to have the photographic evidence helped me to realise a part of myself I’d been struggling to express.  When I started to write erotica as Ruby Kiddell I knew exactly who Ruby was, she was the woman in the photographs that Matt had captured and helped to create.

Ruby Kiddell photoshootI can’t promise that boudoir photography will change your life but it is a wonderful opportunity to explore a different part of your personality – to be playful, dominant, seductive or demure – and Matt really is a wonderful person and photographer to do this with.  While my photoshoot was six years ago I know Matt’s welcoming and warm nature is the same as ever.

I’m very lucky to have continued to have Matt in my life as a friend and I’ll always treasure his photos of me.

Find out more about Matt Christie and his boudoir photography here http://www.mattchristieboudoir.com/

Thanks for reading,

Ruby x

If you enjoyed my writing you can find more of my erotic fiction stories on Amazon.co.uk and Amazon.com, don't be shy leave a review!

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Posted by on Jan 24, 2014 in Blog | 0 comments

Elust 54

Elust 54

Elustheader Photo courtesy of Gritty Woman

Welcome to e[lust] – The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at e[lust]. Want to be included in e[lust] #55? Start with the rules, come back February 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

 

How children will break UK Internet filters.

Submissive, Not Passive

When Sex and Disabilities Collide

 

 

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Tribute to a Selfie

The Pawn

 

 

 

~ Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Blogging

My 20 of 2013

Hello 2014

Erotic Fiction

Call Me Maybe

To Watch…

Holiday Travails

The third message

So You Want to Worship Me…Start Here.

Three Stories Up

Men in cages

Lucky Mascot – Huddle: Sex With Sporty Queers

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Sex Toys Storage: Hiding from People

SexyLittleIdeas -11 Annoying yet Sexual Dares

His PTSD Cheated on Me

Cum

You’re Art but I’m Not

Anger and intimacy

Among a Sea of Submissives

Object

My experiences with unwanted intercourse

Erotic Non-Fiction

Phoenix lies and gets herself in trouble

The Storm Behind the Calm

Why I eat your pussy

Light My Fire – Zoe Tries Fire Play

Spreading Christmas Cheer

I write a letter to The Neighbor

Humiliation

Sa’afia’s punishment night (1st IV scenes)

Both ends of the spectrum

Love of Flesh; Want for Blood

First Blush

Birthday Burning

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

Dear Mollena…

The Best Motivator

on liberties taken.

Submission, More Than A Feeling

Breaking Prude – The Dirty Seven

Poetry

Just Touch It

A Time To Cum

Sex News,Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Shoe Fetishism – RZ

elustbutton200

Thanks for reading,

Ruby x

If you enjoyed my writing you can find more of my erotic fiction stories on Amazon.co.uk and Amazon.com, don't be shy leave a review!

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Posted by on Jan 3, 2014 in Blog | 5 comments

Women write about sex shocker!

Is the notion of women’s agency over their sexuality still so other that we are shocked that women have an interest in and write about sex?

This Telegraph article about erotic romance author Geraldine O-Hara has the headline “Writing about sex: The last thing you’d expect from this mother of five who knits”

What is it that The Telegraph find surprising? Is it that she is a woman writing about sex? Is it that she is a mother? Is it that she knits?  The article in itself, written by Geraldine, talks about the stigma she felt as a writer and her fear of being judged harshly as a woman and a parent, sadly the headline written by the Telegraph only goes to reinforce the prejudice and attitudes that Geraldine writes of.

I’m rather interested in any parenting tips Geraldine can pass my way as a mother of five to a mother of one, but that aside why shouldn’t a mother write about sex? Why is the number of her children relevant and so what if she knits? This headline is a car crash of assumptions about the roles of women and mothers and what they should or shouldn’t be doing to fill their time.  Why are mothers still not expected to express our sexuality or be interested in sex? I’ve had men on Twitter asking me not to talk about my daughter on my feed as they found it uncomfortable as I also talk about sex and sexuality, as if I can’t exist as a parent and a sexual person at the same time. I call bullshit. How do you think I got my daughter in the first place?

It is YOUR problem if as my reader you cannot understand that I am a whole person with different parts of my life; my work, my child, my home and family, my writing, my sex.

In my experience of running Eroticon it is predominantly women who write sex blogs, erotica and erotic romance, or to be specific; predominantly women who write sex blogs, erotica and erotic romance and want to attend an event where they can learn new skills and meet other writers in the same genre.  There are men that write about sex, but anecdotal evidence suggests that within the erotica, erotic romance genres and sex bloggers women writers outweigh men.

It seems fair to suggest that people tend to write about what interests them and what they care about, they write about what is fun and challenging to them.  If women don’t write about sex who will and whose version will inform the world we live in?  Why should it be so shocking that women find sex a subject that they want to interrogate, share their experiences of or fictionalise?  If we are writing for ourselves and others outside the mainstream press, publishing and media then it might suggest that the established voices talking about sex aren’t doing a very good job of engaging us.

I think there is also an underlying snobbery about taking the romance and erotica genres seriously as if the notion that these genres that appeal predominantly to women are somehow less worthy of respect. Think about it, when was the last time you saw a, “Man writes crime fiction shocker” style headline? (yes I know not all crime writers and readers are male, but I hope you get my point)

Women have always written about sex, it may not have been explicit portrayals of sex but there is always sex within the stories they write; from the Bronte sisters to Jane Austin sex is ever present as an underlying force in the works of fiction that talk about women’s lives and women’s experiences of the world. Vita Sackville West, Radcliffe Hall and Virgina Woolf all speak of the struggles of sex and identity.  Nancy Friday collected women’s fantasies and Jackie Collins and Jilly Cooper brought us outrageously celebrity soaked sex.  More recently Zoe Margolis wrote of her experience as a young woman dating in London in the naughties.  Yet the media seem to forget all of these writers and more until Fifty Shades of Grey reminded them that women like sex and like to write about it and read about.

We all have an experience of sex and sexuality and if we chose to write a sex blog about our life or to include suggested or explicit sex into our fictions we should be judged on the merit of our writing not on the number of our children or our crafting hobbies and most of all, no-one should be surprised that as women we find sex interesting.

Thanks for reading,

Ruby x

If you enjoyed my writing you can find more of my erotic fiction stories on Amazon.co.uk and Amazon.com, don't be shy leave a review!

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Posted by on Dec 10, 2013 in Calls for submissions, News | 0 comments

NEWS! I’m working with Velvet Books on a series of erotica anthologies

NEWS! I’m working with Velvet Books on a series of erotica anthologies

Velvet booksI’m so thrilled to let you all know that I’ve been approached by Velvet Books to work on a series of anthologies with them.  

Last month I finally had time to make it up to London to meet with the team and thrash out the details and I have to say it is looking like a very exciting project.  I first met the team behind Velvet Books when they came to Eroticon 2013 and were delighted when they wanted to publish the conference anthology.  While the Velvet Team have a solid commercial, design and marketing presence they were in need of someone to hook them up with writers – perhaps they were a bit shy of all the brains behind the steaming hot erotica that is being written at the moment?  And so they asked me to be their front woman to kick start their anthologies collections.

With the call for submissions for Eroticon 2013 anthology, Southbank Seduction, ending soon, and boy-oh-boy do we have some fantastic contributions already, it is time for another call for submissions, this time for the Raising the Curtain, an anthology of theatrical erotica!

I love this theme, I trained as a dancer and there is something magical about being backstage – I’m sure it is a fertile ground for erotic inspiration!

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curtain craig hatfieldCall for submissions : Raising the Curtain :  An anthology of erotica inspired by the theatre.

What goes on behind the velvet curtains of the theatre? 

Is there more drama backstage than onstage? 

Does the sexual tension between the stars of the show get x-rated once the curtain drops and the audience has left?

We’re looking for erotica stories inspired by the drama of the theatre both on and offstage, from amateur dramatics to the high glamour of Broadway or the West End.

We have a strong preference for stories that have female characters and female pleasure as their focal point and have well developed characters and narratives.  Although all work will be considered on merit.

Anthology submission guidelines:

  • Submissions must be 3,000 to 5,000 word erotica stories and be original and your own work.
  • Submissions are open to all writers.
  • Deadline is 31st March 2014 for publication in summer 2014.
  • Payment will be £50 per accepted story.
  • The anthology will be edited by Ruby Kiddell, author of the BDSM novella Normal, editor of the Eroticon 2012 anthology Dirty Thoughts from the Back of the Room and the organiser of the Eroticon conferences for sex bloggers and erotica writers.
  • Please send your story as a word document formatted to 10pt Arial, double spaced to  or submit via our “Write for Velvet” page
  • Please include “Raising the Curtain” and the title of the story in the email subject line.
  • Please include your legal name, your pseudonym, email address and any social media or website links on the first page of your submission.
  • The anthology will be published by Velvet Books, all sexual activity must be consensual and legal.
  • Rights – 5 years worldwide exclusive audio, ebook and print.
  • We will consider previously published work as long as it is out of contract, please indicate details in your cover note.

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Image credit: Craig Hatfield via Flickr

Thanks for reading,

Ruby x

If you enjoyed my writing you can find more of my erotic fiction stories on Amazon.co.uk and Amazon.com, don't be shy leave a review!

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